Lesson Unlearned

“Your crazy!” Those two words had me stuck in a place I never want to be in. When the body experience trauma it becomes condition to the traumatic environment. So naturally when you get triggered all your body either goes into fight or flight. For me? Well, I fight. I sat up at 2am thinking how did I let something so little disturb me. As, I prayed before God I realized that the emotional/verbal abuse I endure for years was at the root cause of my heaviness. I worshipped and prayed. I prayed and worshipped until God released me. I never really said out loud that I have been verbally abused. The rape and physical abuse was easy. Everyone understood those but me sitting here being tortured by words I couldn’t explain. Then, I remembered “You are crazy originated every time I came closer to finding out he was cheating or every time I advanced in the kingdom.” Those words was the distraction or speed bump that kept me dormant. Isaiah 43:19 “For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.” God quicken this scripture in my spirit because the test which was meant to take my focus shifted my focus on the path I am currently on. Growing up, I always heard a lesson unlearned is a lesson returned. This lesson was learned. Although, the words did affect me it caused me to look at the root. This is very strategic for every believer deal with the spirit and leave the person alone. You conquer the spirit the persons flesh is subdued! This season be intentional about your walk with God and know that even in my broken pieces I am perfect in God’s sight!